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Aries
March 21 - April 20 |
your Love zone has extended.
Avoid wearing a thong with hipsters |
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Taurus
April 21 - May 21 |
on Wednesday night you'll
be licking honey off a stranger's tummy |
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Gemini
May 22 - June 21 |
the twins are in conflict
with Mars. Its a drive in Saturday. |
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Cancer
June 22 - July 22 |
time to pause and reflect
on that whole thing that happened with James last week |
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Leo
July 23 - August 23 |
ferocious Leos wil have
cause to shake their manes this month when a friend breaks a Hoover. |
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Virgo
August 24 - Sept 23 |
your trusting nature
is tested by a vicious dog attack |
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Libra
Sept 24 - October 23 |
a horrible misjudgement
may upset your Moon cycle |
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Scorpio
Oct 24 - Nov 22 |
scorpios
who enjoy administering the lash will get drunk and overdo it and
be arrested |
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Sagittarius
Nov 23 - Dec 21 |
you will fall in love
with a Dry Cleaner |
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Capricorn
Dec 22 - Jan 20 |
the Unicorn in your
chart presents a horn of plenty |
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Aquarius
Jan 21 - Feb 19 |
an ex will fan the flames
of your passion but heartache may follow desire until quenched by
the wine of renewal |
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Pisces
Feb 20 - March 20 |
see
Taurus |
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